Peaches the chicken

        I want to tell you a story. A very true story that I have waited awhile to tell because we needed to get through a time of ‘mourning’ in our house. But now that life seems to be back to normal (if there’s such a thing as normal), I think I’m in the safe zone.
A few weeks ago, one of our chickens met an untimely death. Somewhat traumatic for all involved, but especially for a certain 6 year old boy. Now, my kids are not naïve to death. Unfortunately, we’ve faced it head-on a number of times, whether it be people we love or numerous animals that had become our friends. And they do realize (to some degree) that every time they eat a beloved chicken nugget or grilled chicken off the BBQ that those are, in fact, dead chickens.
But, when they become your friends, even a chicken’s passing is very hard to take. It did not die right away, and not 10 minutes had passed by and Ben had created a prayer sign-up sheet so we could all take shifts to pray for healing for Peaches. He also used color-coded markers to create a graph with sign-ups for bringing food and water. He is our problem solver and crisis manager.
Dave and I knew the chicken wouldn’t make it. But we did sign up for a shift on the prayer vigil- it was the right thing to do. The next morning, we explained that Peaches did not make it through the night. Emma and Katie seemed somewhat reflective, but then asked for Toaster Strudels and cartoons- obviously they were ok with the whole thing.
Ben immediately went and got another sheet of paper and began drawing pictures. “Are you ok, buddy?” We asked him, “What are you doing?”
“I’m planning Peaches funeral. We’ll have to have it tonight before baseball practice,“ he said with complete sincerity, “Will you be home in time to help me with the funeral, dad?” He looked up at Dave with his big brown eyes and pen poised ready to begin writing Dave’s duties for said funeral. Dave stared at him for a few seconds of uncomfortable silence- I’m assuming he was trying to choose his words carefully and remember what it felt like to be 6.
“I will be home in time,” Dave said seriously.
I forgot about the dead chicken. Until Ben got home from school and the planning commenced. By 5pm that night, he had everything ready- a table set up with a few flowers, some snacks and ice water, and he sat soberly in his black baseball pants and black underarmor shirt waiting for Dave to get home. Emma and Katie were running through the house playing hide and seek and Ben kept saying, “We need it quiet in here before the funeral.”
I was trying to occupy myself with making dinner, but it’s hard to feel sad about the chicken when you’re making chicken and rice for dinner. I maybe should have thought that one out a little better. Finally Dave got home and we all filed out into the backyard.
A hole had already been dug and Peaches lay wrapped in an old towel with just her head sticking out. Dave said, “Ben, why don’t you lay Peaches in the hole now.”
“Wait, dad,” he said quickly, “I need one more picture with her to remember her by.” He gently picked her up. Dave and I exchanged confused glances and I just shrugged my shoulders, mostly just wanting to get this over with. Dave pulled out his phone and said, “Ok, one picture.” I expected a picture with a somewhat somber tone, but Ben smiled his biggest smile while holding that dead chicken up in the air. I sincerely hope he doesn’t ask for that one to be framed.
Then, as he went to lay the chicken in the hole, he flipped it over and her other eye was wide open. “She’s ALIVE!” screamed Katie at the top of her lungs. Emma started jumping up and down yelling, “She’s not dead, Ben!” All chaos broke loose as Ben quickly set her on the ground to investigate. “Dad, her eye is open! I think she made it!” Darn freaky chicken eye. Dave quickly de-escalated the situation by explaining, once again, that the chicken was indeed dead.
We buried her and then stood around in awkward silence. I could tell the girls were bored with this whole situation, and we needed to move on. I was just about ready to say dinner was ready when Ben said, “Now we can each say a memory or a little prayer.” I could feel the giggles welling up inside me, but there was no way I was letting them out. Emma and Kate both said a little prayer, and I’m pretty sure Katie’s included, “Thank you God for this food” but I’m not entirely sure. I was just trying not to lose it. When Dave’s turn came, he just seriously said, “I’ll pass on this one”. Ben took a big deep breath and said, “Ok, I guess I’ll pray then.” He bowed his head down and this is what he said: “Thank you God for Peaches, she was a very fun chicken to play with. We will miss her and we are all heartbroken.”
I couldn’t stop it from coming. A giggle escaped my lips and I quickly put my hands to my face to muffle it. Ben looked up fast and I dipped my head down. He came over and grabbed my hand, “Now mom’s crying.” He said to Dave. Dave took off for the house and barely got the slider door closed before he started laughing. “Where’s dad going?” He asked seriously.
“I think Dad just needs some time alone,” I managed to say through my hands that were still covering my face.
Ben seemed satisfied that we were all feeling so much emotion. “The funeral is over now,” he said, “thank you for coming.”
We went about our business as usual the rest of the night. Dave and I waited till about 11pm that night to really laugh about the whole thing. And the question still remains- How long is too long to keep a picture of a dead chicken on your phone? In the weeks since this dramatic event, life has gone back to normal. And just so you know- we have a new chicken to take Peaches place, and her name is Little Chocolate Campfire. And don’t ask - I have no idea why that’s her name.

Ok- I know, the blog has been neglected! But I've caught up on some things :) Here are some of the things that have been going on in the Hughes house the last few weeks! Hope everyone is doing great and enjoying spring!

Putting himself on time-out

     Yesterday afternoon I sat down at the computer to just chill for a few minutes.  The crazy part of my afternoon was over- kids had all been picked up from school, snacks had been given, homework folders gone through, and lunch boxes emptied out.
I had been brought up to date on who said what at recess, who got in trouble at circle time, and how interesting learning about fractions is. The neighbor girls had rung the door bell so I sent everyone outside to play. I knew 2 loads of laundry needed to be folded, but I also knew I should take advantage of the quiet. I sipped on my iced tea and got caught up on some news.
That’s when I heard it. I literally had only been sitting for 3.5 minutes when I heard a loud BANG. Hmmm. I glanced outside and all the kids seemed to be fine- laughing, playing, running around. I went and checked rooms, nothing was out of place. Weird. I went and sat back down.
Then, out of the corner of my eye I saw Ben pass by the front window on his way to the garage. He looked…….nervous. I heard the garage door open and reluctant footsteps shuffling my way. I turned as he came into the room, his head hung low and shoulders drooping. He walked right up to me. “What’s the matter?” I asked, almost afraid of the answer.
“Well,” he mumbled, “I am definitely going to have to go on time-out for this one.” Uh-oh.
  “What did you do?” I asked.
“I just got way too hyper and a rock accidentally broke the window. I am so s sorry.” He said.
A few seconds of silence as I tried to process the news. “I guess you need to go show me,” I said as I stood up.
“Okay, I’ll show you, but maybe we should hug first before we go out there.” He said back. The kid is always trying to butter me up.
We walked out front to the other side of the house and there it was- a very broken window, and one little rock laying underneath as evidence. Now my head drooped. I took some very deep breaths. I was about ready to lose my temper when an image suddenly popped into my head:
I’m 15 years old and I’m pretty into my own awesome self. I had been driving with a permit for almost a year and of course, I thought I was an amazing at it. My mom was sitting in the front seat, the music was on and I was feeling well, let’s face it- a little too hyper. I took the corner pretty tight as we pulled onto the main road and my mom yelled out, “Nikki, you just hit the mailbox!”
“I did not hit it!” I said back, “I didn’t even feel anything!”
“Yes, you did,” she said back. “It scraped the side of the car!”
“Did I hit the mailbox?” I glanced back at my two little sisters sitting in the back seat looking like deer caught in the headlights. Being very wise beyond their years, they both sided with my mom.
“Keep going because we don’t want to be late- we’ll check the car when we get there.” My mom said.
“Nothing’s going to be there.” I was absolutely positive I didn’t hit it. The rest of the car ride was eerily quiet.
When we pulled into the parking lot everyone got out. And there, scraped all down the side of the car was the evidence. And my mom’s head drooped. And I felt nauseous as I looked at her and saw the frustration in her face. But she didn’t yell.  She didn’t lose her temper. She was disappointed and that was enough for me. She hugged me and said, “you have got to be more careful!” We talked about not being too cocky- not letting your excitement overrule common sense. And I’m sure I paid my dues for that one- but I remember feeling loved even when I did something wrong.
I felt my anger drain away as I glanced from the window to a little boy with tears running down his cheeks. A little boy who was already promising to help dad fix it. A little boy who needs to learn from his mistakes. I knelt down and gave him a hug, and felt like I was going back in time 20 years as I said to him, “You have to be more careful.”
We talked about why it happened, and what he did wrong. The he said, “I’ll just go put myself on time-out now.” And he did.

A lesson learned

     I’m halfway down the frozen foods aisle intently trying to decide which popsicles to buy. The freezer door is open and Ben is begging for ice cream sandwiches and Katie is making handprints on the fogged up glass. I have NO IDEA what possessed Ben to do what I was about to witness. Out of the blue he decides to lick the shelf inside the freezer. I have no words. And of course, it got stuck. He froze in what I’m only assuming was instant panic and regret all rolled into one. A few seconds passed while I could only stare at him- did he just lick that frozen shelf? Before I even had time to think about what to do, he yanked himself off, leaving some of his poor skin behind (is it called skin if it’s on the tongue??-not sure).
     Some blood followed. Some screams followed. Some stares followed. I tried to paste on my stressed out mommy- smile that I’m sure freaks people out more than if I actually lost it. Luckily no frustrated words from me were even necessary. I actually never said anything until 2 more aisles over. He had stopped crying and finally said, “I’m not sure why I did that, but I’m never doing it again.” Lesson learned.
For some reason I’m thinking A Christmas Story needs to be watched in this house…

Easter and Spring break

We had a great time celebrating Easter at my mom's house in Dallas! Such a fun filled weekend with family, remembering the miracle of the empty grave, and of course, an awesome Easter egg hunt... The, we stayed a few more days to take a quick trip to the beach and get some much needed rest. It was a fun spring break!

Nana and the grandkids in their Easter best :)

Jackson, Ben, Austin and Charlie looking very handsome

Bodine ladies!

Emma and Katie picking daffodils for the cross

Hanging out in Depot Bay, Oregon

Me and my man :)

Dave and the kids

Emma loved riding the quad with Dave (and so did Ben and Katie- it was hit for all!)

Ready, set, go! It's a HUGE cousin egg hunt- thanks Uncle Randy for filling SO MANY eggs!

 Hughes fam!

Brutally honest

     We all know that kids are brutally honest. Not a day goes by that they keep their opinions to themselves- which I guess keeps me humble. I might have a day where I’m thinking, “Dang, I am looking pretty good right now”, only to be told 5 minutes later by my 3 year old that I’m “huge compared to her.” So good for my self esteem.
      Here’s a few of my absolute favorite ‘opinions’ my kids have felt necessary to tell me:
“You kinda still look like there’s a baby in there.”
“You smell.”
“Your hair looks like gross noodles.”
“If you sat on me I would die.”
“You should wear prettier shoes.”
“Maybe you should go running like that lady.”
“This chicken doesn’t taste at all like chicken.”
“Your breath is so gross.”
“You could take a cooking class.”
“Do you brush your teeth at all?”
     People, I could go on and on, but I think you get the idea- and if you’ve been around kids at all, you’ve been there too. So, the last couple days I’ve been trying to reinforce (AGAIN), the idea of a positive compliment. Now, I’m all for kids having their own opinions- but I’m also for teaching them to FILTER them a little better. For instance, if they’re at school and somebody stinks to high heaven, instead of saying, “You smell disgusting!” they could try and find something positive about that person that they DO like.
    Which brings me to today. I’ve been getting LOTS of compliments by all 3 kids. And that’s wonderful. But it’s led me to some sort of uneasy conclusion: either I am having a rockstar day as a mom and they just can’t control themselves with how amazing I am, OR-  they are still thinking the negative stuff and trying hard to come up with positive things to say. I’m actually a little more self-conscious NOW then I was before. Just do me a favor- if my kids pay you a compliment, just try and take it at face value, ok? I know that’s what I’m gonna tell myself anyway….

A couple of Katie stories

Katie: (Standing right by my feet as I was making her dinner) : “Are you thinking what I’m thinking mom?”
Me: “I don’t know, what are you thinking?”
Katie: “I’m thinking that I want candy corns for dinner.”
Me: “No, I wasn’t thinking that at all. Sorry.”
Katie: “Then I don’t want dinner.”


     Katie was helping me make homemade cookies today. I was measuring stuff and she was dumping it in the bowl. Simultaneously I was also making dinner, which I would highly NOT recommend EVER. So, I was a little distracted and frazzled, but we were having fun anyway.
     We had just dumped in the flour and turned on the mixer. I turned my back for a couple minutes to check dinner and that’s when I heard a thump-thump-thumping sound coming from the Kitchenade. I turned and Katie was looking at me with a panicked look and the bowl was doing it’s own little crazy dance.
     “What did you do?” I asked while I quickly turned off the mixer.
      She looked into the bowl, and then touched my face with her butter-covered hands and said, “Please don’t be mad at me, Mama Bird.”
      I wasn’t mad. How could I be mad when she calls me Mama Bird with flour streaks across her face and chocolate chip lips? I investigated the dough and fished out a plastic spoon and measuring cup. I think they’ve seen better days.
       That’s just how it goes when you choose to bake with a 3 year old- Never turn your back on them…

Tale of Two Cities

I woke up this morning with a simple phrase going through my head- "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.." Of course we know this famous sentence as the opening line of A Tale of Two Cities. I haven't read this classic since high school, but the words have stuck with me. Sometimes life feels exactly like this, and the last few weeks have not been an exception. They have been.....interesting. Hard. Emotional. Tiring. And it some ways Wonderful. All of these things combined. Some moments seem like the best times of our life. Others seem like the worst. But that, my friends, is this wonderful ride we're on called LIFE. All of our experiences (both the peaks and the valleys), our day-to-day routines, and the good, the bad and the ugly things that happen our shaping our lives. Building our character. Strengthening or weakening us.
Who is it shaping us into? And who are we turning to for our strength?
Dave and I have been worried about family situations- but God is in control. I know He is. I'm putting my hope in HIM. He is with us through our best times and our worst times, we just need to stop trying to do it ourselves, and take the leap into His loving arms- He's waiting to catch us....

Emma's 9th Birthday

I Seriously can't believe our oldest girl is 9! She had her birthday planned for months, and I'm pretty sure it went EXACTLY how she wanted it to go :) We picked up her best friend Preslie and headed to Firstenberg Community Center to go swimming! I think the two of them went down the slide about 50 times. After that we headed to the mall for an afternoon of shopping. And thanks to generous Grandpas/Grandmas, Nana, Aunts/Uncles and Mom/Dad she had a whopping $96 to spend! And believe me, she spent it all. Then it was back to our house for pizza and cake, movies and a sleepover. Her words, not mine- "This day ROCKS mom!" Ahhh- music to my ears- Happy Birthday Emma! Here are somepictures of Emma and Preslie during their girls day out....

A few kiddo stories to share

Emma: “Mom, I want to tell you something without you getting your feelings hurt.”
Me: “Okaaaay.” (bracing myself for the all-out honesty that is so refreshing in children).
Emma: Well, I’m not saying this because I don’t think you know anything.”
Me: “Wow- all right…”
Emma: “I sometimes wish I had a mom that had all the answers to everything I want to know all the time.”
Me: (letting out a sigh of relief) “Oh, well, I can handle that. I wish I knew everything too. I think we all wish that. But then I’d be a superhero and probably be so busy that I wouldn’t have time to have these fun heart-to-hearts, right?”
Emma: (staring blankly at me for a few seconds)“Well, I‘m gonna go play outside now.”
Allrighty then….

    You know that phrase "the best laid plans of mice and men often go astray”? Well, that happened at my house tonight. I had GLORIOUS plans. FUN plans. I made a snap decision sometime around 7pm that I would surprise the kids with a game of hide-and-seek. Instead of our standard story time, we would run around the house giggling and having a ball.
    It sounded AMAZING in my head- it really did. Hard core bonding time is always a great idea right before bed, right? Anyway, things started out great. When I told the kids my idea they FREAKED. My announcement was met with awe and a round of applause. I felt like mom of the year.
    But then the game started. Fights broke out right away. There was one MAJOR temper tantrum. One shoving match. 2 skinned knees. 1 door slammed on a hand. A torn shower curtain. A bag of spilled coconut (don’t ask). About a million “Hey, that’s not fair’s!” And 1 mom with CRAZY I’m-about-to-lose-it eyes.
    Our game ended abruptly at 8:09. 21 minutes before it was supposed to end but ½ an hour too late. I tucked  3 crying and frustrated kids into bed, and am trying to process what just happened. It was scary, really. Apparently in my house when we play a game of hide and seek our motto is “Go big or go home.” I am now going to drown my sorrows in chocolate, and will be taking a permanent leave of absence from any and all games resembling hide and seek.

Me: “Why is Katie crying?”
Ben: “I gave her a hug, that’s all I know.”
Me: (with one eyebrow raised) “Why would she be crying if you gave her a hug?”
Ben: “Hmmm.. Well, I did hit her on accident first before I gave her the hug, so I think maybe that’s the real reason she‘s crying.”

Sunny Day

We actually had a warm sunny couple days a couple weeks ago, and Katie and Ben sure took advantage of it! They've been so sun-deprived that it felt like summer- ha! Emma was at school so she was not to happy about that :)

Finding my marbles

        If you come over to our house you will probably be wondering why we have 4 jars of marbles sitting on the counter. They do look pretty, but it’s not an attempt at new décor by any means. We have implemented a new system in our house in order to try and regain control of the use of all things electronic. After much thought and consideration, we came up with the idea of marbles. It’s tangible, it’s fun, and we had them already (bonus!).
In the morning each kid gets 6 marbles in their jar. Each marble represents 10 minutes of electronic time (computer, Ipod, DS, Ipad, and Wii). When they want to play a game, they have to move a marble into the “used up” jar and set the timer for 10 minutes. If they know that a game will take longer, they just take out more marbles. You get the idea, right? When the marbles are gone, they are GONE.
Now, we knew this would be an adjustment, and we knew that one of our children in particular was going to have a VERY hard time with this. If we’re honest we actually developed the system specifically for this kid, but there’s no way we could say that- we don’t want mutiny on our hands. If your curiosity is getting the best of you, I’ll give you a little hint- this kid is NOT female.
So, we sat them down. We explained the system. They all seemed a little shocked but willing to give it a try. Ben dove right in and transferred a marble so he could play the Ipad. When the timer went off he put another one in. He seemed to LOVE the new system. But by late afternoon his marbles were GONE. At this point he did NOT love the new system. As I was empting the dishwasher I saw him out of the corner of my eye. He was staring at the jars on the counter.
“Whatcha doing?” I asked.
“I’m sad all my marbles are gone,” he said, “Can I buy more marbles? I have like 43 cents?”
“Nope. It doesn’t work that way.”
“But look how many Emma has! She’s only used one! Can’t I ask her if I can borrow some?”
“That’s not how it works either. You have to wait till tomorrow morning to get your marbles back,” I replied.
Grunts followed as he stomped away to his room. Throughout the evening we caught him staring longingly at his jar. That night only his was empty. Emma (who could really care less if she played electronics or not) still had 5 in her jar. Katie had one left. As I tucked him into bed he said, “I am SO excited to wake up and see all my marbles in the jar tomorrow!”
His anticipation was a little contagious, and I found myself excited to fill up his jar when I woke up. When he came out with crazy hair and sleepy eyes a few minutes later he went straight to his jar, lined his marbles up to count them, and then smiled at me.
I suddenly had a thought come into my mind- what if I was that excited to use my precious free time to go before the Lord? What if I couldn’t wait to wake up and see what amazing things he had in store for me? What if I wasn’t allowed to worship God? What if I was restricted in how I could worship? It seems in our human nature, when something is taken away or restricted, we begin to crave it even more.
We take so much for granted. Some people walk miles and risk certain death to proclaim that Jesus is Lord. Many people are thrown in jail for it. Many are worshiping “underground” because they have been told they cannot serve and worship God. But they do it anyway. They CRAVE to be in his presence. Nothing will get in their way.
What about me? And you? We live in a fast-paced culture. Time is money. You need to be busy and productive. Every day we make choices as to how we spend our time, how we are filling our “used up” jar. I can say with all honesty that my “used up” jar makes me cringe most of the time.
God wants a relationship with us. He wants us to fill our “used up” jars with time spent with Him, time using the gifts He has given us, and He wants those times where we just sit in silence at His feet. I want to go to bed humbly thanking God that He helped me spend my time wisely, and excited to wake up with new hope! And the AWESOME thing is, we wake up to a marble jar filled to the brim and OVERFLOWING with God’s promises for us.
Ben is excited to have his 6 marbles. God’s time with us is unlimited! Let’s take advantage of it and all He has planned for us! Let’s trade in some of our marbles that we spend on TV, movies, and magazines- let’s use as many of our marbles as we can to further God’s kingdom and make the most of every single day He has given us!
And say a prayer for Ben- he is still using up all his marbles by afternoon. And he’s still trying to negotiate a good price for all unused marbles.